The Government Webcam Guy

 Mark: typing on his laptop “Clara, why are you taping a sticky note over your webcam?”

Clara: whispers “Mark. He’s watching.”

Mark: blinking “Who?”

Clara: “The Government Webcam Guy.”

Mark: sighing “Oh no.”

Clara: “Think about it! Every device has a camera now—laptops, phones, fridges—”

Mark: raising a finger “Okay, if your fridge is spying on you, that’s a you problem.”

Clara: ignoring him “And someone, somewhere, has to be monitoring them.”

Mark: “No one is watching you, Clara.”

Clara: dramatic pause “Then why did my laptop camera turn on by itself yesterday?”

Mark: freezing “…Wait. What?”

Clara: nodding intensely “JUST FOR A SECOND. A tiny green light. Then—gone.”

Mark: slowly closing his laptop “That’s… not great.”

Clara: grinning “SEE?! THEY’RE OUT THERE.”

📱 Clara’s phone suddenly lights up. 📱

Clara: staring at it “Oh no.”

Mark: watching nervously “What?”

Clara: whispers “He knows we’re talking about him.”

Mark: “It’s probably just a notification.”

Clara: picking up phone “IT’S FROM AN UNKNOWN NUMBER.”

Mark: “DO NOT OPEN IT.”

📩 Clara opens it. 📩

Text Message: “Nice try, Clara.”

Mark: screaming

Clara: absolutely delighted “MARK. WE’RE IN.”

Mark: “IN WHAT?! I DID NOT SIGN UP FOR THIS.”

🖥️ Mark’s laptop suddenly makes a sound. 🖥️

💻 NEW MESSAGE ON SCREEN: “We see you.”

🚀 [ONE CHAOTIC PANIC ATTACK LATER…] 🚀

🔒 EPILOGUE: CLARA & MARK, HIDING IN A BLANKET FORT

Mark: hugging knees “We are being hunted by the government.”

Clara: grinning, eating chips “Nah, this is just a warning.”

Mark: “HOW ARE YOU SO CALM?!”

Clara: shrugging “If they really wanted us gone, we’d already be in an unmarked van.”

Mark: shaking “That doesn’t make me feel better.”

Clara: “Besides, they don’t know what I’m planning next.”

Mark: horrified “Clara, for the love of all things sane—”

Clara: “I’m gonna hack them first.”

Mark: screaming internally.

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